Stepping In

When I started writing this post, I had just arrived home from rehearsal where we staged one of the bigger group numbers.  In my position as Assistant Director I have been tasked with helping to stage the large, full cast songs.  It is certainly a challenge to conceptualize all of those bodies on the stage and the pictures that putting them all in the right places creates.  There is also managing all of the personalities of the actors on stage and the ideas that they bring to the table.  It is quite the mixed bag of challenges.  And, on top of all that, I have been brought in more than halfway through the process so, much of the trajectory of the show and overarching directorial decisions.  Basically, I’m doing my best to make someone else’s vison come to light.  It is definitely a different process than being with the role and the idea from the beginning, but it is not one that I haven’t experienced before.  I actually have been called in the last minute to help out a production.  After the last time it happened, I started to wonder if word had gotten out that I was the person to bring in in a pinch.

I began this specific branch of my “career” back in California.  One of my favorite places to perform announced that they were doing the musical version of “Little Women”.  For the moment it was announced, I wanted so badly to be a part of the production.  Unfortunately, I was committed to another play that ran at the same time.  I got over the disappointment of losing out on “Little Women” and move forward with my theatre agenda.  But this was not the last time I was brought back to the possibility of my previously deaired show.  As I ticked off the months until my show was to begin rehearsals, I received some disappointing news.  The show I was supposed to do had been cancelled and I was without a show in that slot.  But “Little Women” had already been cast, much to my chagrin.  And yet again, I wiped my hand clean of it and sought out another play to fill the spot.  I didn’t give “Little Woman” a second thought until my closing show of “Beyond Therapy”, the fantastic show that I had the good fortune to be a part of.

I was literally taking my final bows as Prudence in “Beyond Therapy” when I received a text message saying that someone had walked out of tech week of “Little Women”, and I was the only person who could come in and rescue the production.  I quickly texted back and was summoned to “Little Women” rehearsal to jump in with both feet.  As I drove the 40 minutes, I realized that I had no idea what part I was stepping into.  As I mused over the possibilities, I found a secret hope that I wasn’t going to be replacing Jo.  Of course, I would have done it, but it would have been a beast of a challenge as Jo is the majority of the show. As it turned out I was to play meg, the part that I had had my eyes on from the beginning I arrived and as I stepped out of my car, I was met with the biggest group hug.  And then the real work began.  For the next four days, I rehearsed eight hours a day.  I did my best to cram my head full of choreography, melodies, lines and somehow, I achieved it.  When opening night arrived, I was there, fully part of the March family and that night and the rest of the run was like it was meant to be.

The next time came when my wonderful Lucky Penny was doing “Into the Woods”.  For those who don’t know, “Woods” is one of my favorite shows, having done two full productions in my theatre career, and always wanting to be a part of it whenever it rolls around.  For this particular production, it ended up that I was about five months pregnant with Jasper at the time so, that took the possibility of me being involved this time around.  Or at least so I thought.  As the run of the production went on, the young woman who played Cinderella began to suffer greatly from kidney stones.  They hit her hardest right after opening weekend and in the week leading up to another round of performances the following weekend.  Knowing that she was feeling debilitatingly unwell, Taylor reached out to me with the possibility of needing a replacement to cover her track.   I picked up the script and reviewed the part of Cinderella, having played it over ten years prior, and waited for the green light.  But it didn’t come.  Cinderella had rallied and was going to go on.  I put away the libretto and sent up a little prayer that she was on the mend.

But that was not the last I would hear of “Into the Woods”.  That Friday night while I was making dinner for Atty, I got a call, Cinderella was in too much pain to go on. It was 7pm, and the show was supposed to start at 8.  I grabbed my script and rushed over to the theatre.  When I arrived, I was bustled into the rehearsal room where Taylor had pulled all manner of costumes to try and fit me. Fitting someone on the fly is difficult enough but, like I said before, I was well into my second trimester with Jasper and my baby belly was definitely prominent.  Somehow Taylor found a perfect dress that was just a little too big and miraculously concealed my pregnancy.  It was a miracle in itself.  Then under the capable view of the stage manager I had just enough time to walk Cinderella’s track and come up with a plan for the choreography. It wasn’t much but it was the best all of us could do in the half an hour that we had. 8pm came oh so quickly, and it was time for me to find my way through the show.

The actual performance was a bit of a blur.  I know I hit most of my marks, even if there was a little bit of guidance needed from the rest of the cast. (During “Your Fault”, which is, arguably, one of the most difficult songs in the show, the young man playing Jack very subtly nudged me into crossing where I was supposed to.  I had been so focused on getting the song right that it had flown right out of my head.)  And even despite being constantly on edge trying to remember everything, I had the best of times.  My love for the show and my desire to help my theatre home caried me smoothly through the performance.  Unbeknownst to me, there were other friends in the audience who, when I came out post show showered me with praise and accolades of having no idea that I had only had 30 real minutes of prep.  It was such an exhilarating, exciting, and singular experience.

have also been asked to step in other people’s shoes with very little notice for gala concerts and directing gigs.  Often times people ask me how in world I do it.  My answer is always the same, (and incidentally the answer I give when people marvel over how I manage to parent four kids, including infant twins) I do it because I have to.  Once you accept the responsibility of a last-minute job or a replacement actor, you just do it.  There is not choice n the matter.  You lean the material as quickly as possible and jump into the deep end.  You do lose the long-term experience of creating what you want with the character or performance, but you also have the challenge of fitting yourself in, so the transition is seamless.  What an exciting thing it is to be able to make the choice on the fly and really go with the instincts you have as a performer.  There is the potential for true and organic reactions and character path because you must act on instinct.  It may be rougher than a polished and practiced performance but can also be much more real.  Having the opportunities to make roles on in a matter of days or even hours has been a stressful blessing that I have really loved.  Knowing that I can do it and have done it makes me so much more confident in my daily actor’s life.  Confident is the talent that is instinctual and automatic.  It allows me to know that there are base layers that create something wonderful naturally and then building technique and choices on top will only enrich my character experience.  Also, it is a great shot of adrenaline and from time to time, that can be a blast!